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You hurt me, really hurt me. Not just physically. But emotionally…mentally, sexually, every fucking way you can imagine, you hurt me. You caused me to split. My mind couldnt take it. So I created alters, insiders, to help me to cope. You caused that. It wasnt because I am crazy. It was because of your abuse. It was because of what you did. You caused my rages as a kid, you caused people to hate me. I hated myself. I shouldnt have hated myself. But its hard not to when everywhere you turn there are cruel gestures, words spoken, acts of cruelty. Everyone thought I was a liar, I was the crazy one. You were the liars. You stole my innocence. You stole my life. You stole my childhood. I hate you. I hate every last one of you. Some things that you did, I’ll never get over. How do you get over being almost strangled? Being almost drowned until you passed out and almost died? Being sexually tortured? Getting raped with objects? Having to participate in a porn ring? Being sold for money? How does a person get past those things? I cant. But some day you’ll have to pay. Some day. I know the truth. My close friends, doctor and therapist know the truth. And I am not beyond help as you always made me believe. Some day you’ll pay.
Carol anne

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